Home
What makes a home? Is it the brick, cement, metal and wood that create a home? It is what the heart knows, connections between loved ones, the feeling of being held with love and safety. It is the feeling of being seen as good enough and encouraged to go for what you want, even if it involves leaving home to make your dreams come true. As you make your journey into to this unknown adventure, you find that your home is still with you in your heart. It says to you, “We are with you, you are safe and you can do this.” Your sense of home is reflected in the way you say “hello”, help out a friend, and stand up for yourself. Home is also a place you may return to again and again. You are welcomed with open arms.
Sunday, June 24, 2007
Friday, June 8, 2007
Twenty Years Ago The Lovers Say Goodbye
Lizzie’s mind came back to the present and to the fact that she was sitting in a tree, escaping from the reality of having to move. The sun was setting, Liz felt the air getting colder and she wrapped herself in a brown wool sweater. It was Eddie’s sweater and it smelled of him.
She heard whistling below the branches. It was Eddie’s familiar impression of a woodpecker call. She saw his familiar dark brown curls and a flash of his bright green eyes. He knew where to find her. Liz was glad that Eddie found her. But she didn’t want to talk to him, she was afraid she would cry. “I know you are up there, Lizzie and I know why. Come on down.”, Eddie called to her.
“No way Eddie, I am not coming down. If I have to move away, no way.” So Eddie started to climb. Eddie had always been an active kid, a bit of a runt. But this summer he had a growth spurt. Liz noticed the muscles in his legs and arms as he climbed up to where she sat clutching herself. Eddie sat down quietly next to his miserable friend.
They sat together for a good ten minutes without saying anything. Eddie put his hand on Liz’s shoulder. She felt herself tingling. Her eyes started to well up. It is okay Liz I am going to miss you too. Liz turned to looking at Eddie. He wiped the tears from her cheeks. Liz saw that Eddie was crying too. She had not seen Eddie cry except for the time he lost his dog Ralph or Grandma Helen.
“Why are you crying, I am the one that is moving away?” “I know that’s why I am crying Lizzie. You are my best friend.” He reached out to hold her hand. She gave Eddie her hand to hold and with it some more of her heart. She felt tightness in her chest. She knew it that moment she was deeply in love with Eddie. Oh, no, she thought to herself. I want him to kiss me. In the next second, Liz kisses Eddie, gently on the lips. Eddie returned the kiss and kisses her again and again. She felt herself go weak at the knees.
“Do you like me a little bit”, Liz asked with a smile taking a breather. Eddie leaned over and whispered in her ear, “Yes I like you more than a little bit.” I want to stay home here on this branch kissing you until we die okay?” “Wow, you do? Oh, shut up and kiss me you fool”, Lizzie giggles. Eddie said, “I love you”, again and again and again with every kiss.
The sun was beginning to set. “Lizzie, I want to keep kissing you forever, but it might be safer down on the grass when the sun goes down. “You are right, Eddie.” Liz wiped away a tear and smiled at her closest friend. “Ed, you go down first and catch me.” Liz you know I am always here to catch you.”
As they found safe footing on the earth below, Eddie pulled his dearest friend into his arms under the birch tree. “You know something else we haven’t done Lizzie?” “There are many things we haven’t done? We may never get to do.” Liz is on the verge of weeping again. Eddie whispered in her ear. “Just be here with me Liz. Don’t think about tomorrow or an hour from now. We are under these amazing stars and our favorite birch tree is begging us to dance.”
Her heart was beating so fast she was convinced Eddie could hear her heart breaking. “Take my hand. I don’t want to go”, Lizzie sang. Don’t go stay with me right now. Liz rested her head on Eddie’s chest. “Eddie I feel warm inside. “It isn’t just making out. We have kissed a thousand times before, not like this. Lizzie. It is like I want to take care of you. Protect you and hold you until we both are old and kick the bucket.”
“Liz, let’s just feel this love. Let’s stop talking for a few minutes. But Liz is fearful of the unknown, fears the warmth between her legs and fears never seeing Eddie again. “Lizzie I don’t want you to run away into night away from me as he reached out to her crying. “ Let’s at least have this moment. Let yourself feel happy for a moment.
You will move to tomorrow but we still have this dance,” Eddie softly spoke in her ear. “Sweetie. Don’t run away from what you want, joy, from us.” “I am sorry Eddie I just can’t do this. It is too hard I have to leave you and I have to leave you right now or I wouldn’t be able to leave you at all. Eddie catches her hand. “Honey, let go.” Lizzie yanked her hand away and sprinted out into the darkness. Eddie cried out after Lizzie, “Come back!”, Eddie shouted several times before he collapses on the dark earth. He found their birch tree and leaned his back against it for support. His best friend was gone, Eddie felt lost and that nothing will be the same again.
Ruth and Ted discovered their son in the morning curled up under the white birch. They wondered what had happened. They saw their son’s tear stained face. “Eddie, do you want me to carry you home like a sack of potatoes,” his father asked after Eddie tripped over his feet as he tried to stand up. “Dad, that isn’t necessary. I can walk. I will be okay. “We know that son,” Ruth offered, taking her son’s hand in hers. “You are not alone and Lizzie will be a phone call away.”
“Thanks for saying that Dad. I don’t know. I don’t know anything. She ran away from me Dad, she felt hurt and ran away from me.” Ted and Ruth encircled Eddie in their arms and Eddie cried like a baby.
She heard whistling below the branches. It was Eddie’s familiar impression of a woodpecker call. She saw his familiar dark brown curls and a flash of his bright green eyes. He knew where to find her. Liz was glad that Eddie found her. But she didn’t want to talk to him, she was afraid she would cry. “I know you are up there, Lizzie and I know why. Come on down.”, Eddie called to her.
“No way Eddie, I am not coming down. If I have to move away, no way.” So Eddie started to climb. Eddie had always been an active kid, a bit of a runt. But this summer he had a growth spurt. Liz noticed the muscles in his legs and arms as he climbed up to where she sat clutching herself. Eddie sat down quietly next to his miserable friend.
They sat together for a good ten minutes without saying anything. Eddie put his hand on Liz’s shoulder. She felt herself tingling. Her eyes started to well up. It is okay Liz I am going to miss you too. Liz turned to looking at Eddie. He wiped the tears from her cheeks. Liz saw that Eddie was crying too. She had not seen Eddie cry except for the time he lost his dog Ralph or Grandma Helen.
“Why are you crying, I am the one that is moving away?” “I know that’s why I am crying Lizzie. You are my best friend.” He reached out to hold her hand. She gave Eddie her hand to hold and with it some more of her heart. She felt tightness in her chest. She knew it that moment she was deeply in love with Eddie. Oh, no, she thought to herself. I want him to kiss me. In the next second, Liz kisses Eddie, gently on the lips. Eddie returned the kiss and kisses her again and again. She felt herself go weak at the knees.
“Do you like me a little bit”, Liz asked with a smile taking a breather. Eddie leaned over and whispered in her ear, “Yes I like you more than a little bit.” I want to stay home here on this branch kissing you until we die okay?” “Wow, you do? Oh, shut up and kiss me you fool”, Lizzie giggles. Eddie said, “I love you”, again and again and again with every kiss.
The sun was beginning to set. “Lizzie, I want to keep kissing you forever, but it might be safer down on the grass when the sun goes down. “You are right, Eddie.” Liz wiped away a tear and smiled at her closest friend. “Ed, you go down first and catch me.” Liz you know I am always here to catch you.”
As they found safe footing on the earth below, Eddie pulled his dearest friend into his arms under the birch tree. “You know something else we haven’t done Lizzie?” “There are many things we haven’t done? We may never get to do.” Liz is on the verge of weeping again. Eddie whispered in her ear. “Just be here with me Liz. Don’t think about tomorrow or an hour from now. We are under these amazing stars and our favorite birch tree is begging us to dance.”
Her heart was beating so fast she was convinced Eddie could hear her heart breaking. “Take my hand. I don’t want to go”, Lizzie sang. Don’t go stay with me right now. Liz rested her head on Eddie’s chest. “Eddie I feel warm inside. “It isn’t just making out. We have kissed a thousand times before, not like this. Lizzie. It is like I want to take care of you. Protect you and hold you until we both are old and kick the bucket.”
“Liz, let’s just feel this love. Let’s stop talking for a few minutes. But Liz is fearful of the unknown, fears the warmth between her legs and fears never seeing Eddie again. “Lizzie I don’t want you to run away into night away from me as he reached out to her crying. “ Let’s at least have this moment. Let yourself feel happy for a moment.
You will move to tomorrow but we still have this dance,” Eddie softly spoke in her ear. “Sweetie. Don’t run away from what you want, joy, from us.” “I am sorry Eddie I just can’t do this. It is too hard I have to leave you and I have to leave you right now or I wouldn’t be able to leave you at all. Eddie catches her hand. “Honey, let go.” Lizzie yanked her hand away and sprinted out into the darkness. Eddie cried out after Lizzie, “Come back!”, Eddie shouted several times before he collapses on the dark earth. He found their birch tree and leaned his back against it for support. His best friend was gone, Eddie felt lost and that nothing will be the same again.
Ruth and Ted discovered their son in the morning curled up under the white birch. They wondered what had happened. They saw their son’s tear stained face. “Eddie, do you want me to carry you home like a sack of potatoes,” his father asked after Eddie tripped over his feet as he tried to stand up. “Dad, that isn’t necessary. I can walk. I will be okay. “We know that son,” Ruth offered, taking her son’s hand in hers. “You are not alone and Lizzie will be a phone call away.”
“Thanks for saying that Dad. I don’t know. I don’t know anything. She ran away from me Dad, she felt hurt and ran away from me.” Ted and Ruth encircled Eddie in their arms and Eddie cried like a baby.
An Ending and a Beginning
Elizabeth wanted to run and hide in the deep forest. She took off for a mile into the deep dark wonderful forest. She felt the crunch of the leaves under feet. Sweat was dripping down her forehead by the time she reached the white birch tree and started to climb. She decided she wasn’t going to come down until her parents changed their minds about moving away. She new she wasn’t acting like a sixteen year old she could hear her father saying in her own head but she didn’t care. She wasn’t going to leave her home and her wonderful fun with Eddie.
On the old birch, she found a sturdy branch to sit upon. She had granola bars and water in her backpack. She sat up in the tree for two hours crying and wishing she didn’t have to move. Lizzie thought to herself about the first she laid eyes on Eddie.
Eddie was six. He grinned from ear to ear and his right cheek was smeared with black mud. He looked like a wild creature to me. I was a little frightened. I stood behind my mother. I was five. Mrs. Forrester said this is “Eddie, my little rascal. He has been playing outside, by the looks of him playing with Herman, his frog.” Ruth giggled and winked at her son. She suggested that I go play. Mom had to push me out the door.
I remember mom saying “howler if you need me.” I did howler, after Eddie put Herman down my shirt. Herman was slimmie and smelled like poopy-pants. Herman didn’t seem to be happy in my shirt, because he slithered out two seconds later. Eddie grabbed Herman and ran. I chased this frog bandit. He was fast for a short kid. I had longer legs. I caught up to him by the stream. He was leaning over the edge with something in his hand. I stopped out of breath.
“Come here, I want to show you something, Eddie said. I sat down next this wild creature, Eddie. I tried to see what he was looking at. I couldn’t see unless I leaned over the edge, right next to Eddie. I lay down on my stomach. Eddie had his left hand on Herman and in his right was “Tina” a turtle. “These two are good friend,” Eddie said. From then on, Eddie and I became inseparable friends.
On the old birch, she found a sturdy branch to sit upon. She had granola bars and water in her backpack. She sat up in the tree for two hours crying and wishing she didn’t have to move. Lizzie thought to herself about the first she laid eyes on Eddie.
Eddie was six. He grinned from ear to ear and his right cheek was smeared with black mud. He looked like a wild creature to me. I was a little frightened. I stood behind my mother. I was five. Mrs. Forrester said this is “Eddie, my little rascal. He has been playing outside, by the looks of him playing with Herman, his frog.” Ruth giggled and winked at her son. She suggested that I go play. Mom had to push me out the door.
I remember mom saying “howler if you need me.” I did howler, after Eddie put Herman down my shirt. Herman was slimmie and smelled like poopy-pants. Herman didn’t seem to be happy in my shirt, because he slithered out two seconds later. Eddie grabbed Herman and ran. I chased this frog bandit. He was fast for a short kid. I had longer legs. I caught up to him by the stream. He was leaning over the edge with something in his hand. I stopped out of breath.
“Come here, I want to show you something, Eddie said. I sat down next this wild creature, Eddie. I tried to see what he was looking at. I couldn’t see unless I leaned over the edge, right next to Eddie. I lay down on my stomach. Eddie had his left hand on Herman and in his right was “Tina” a turtle. “These two are good friend,” Eddie said. From then on, Eddie and I became inseparable friends.
Tuesday, June 5, 2007
The BEA
What is the BEA you might be asking? The BEA is the Book Expo of America... It was tremendous!!! It was in NYC with tens of thousands of people attending. The spectacle was stimulating, intimidating and intoxication all rolled into one, plus it was a good learning experience for me. I made some good contacts. I learned that even when I get a publisher for a book..it is going to be also up to create a big buzz about it. Marketing....Publicity....showing alot of pazazz.... Like the example of Grammar Girl..She is a grammar whiz who wanted to write a book about its or it's. To create buzz she developed a weekly podcast called grammar girl. She has five million subscribers. Wow!!! I want to do that...I thought of getting Ask Eve?? on youtube and on a postcast. Sounds like it would be fun to do. Anyway my wheels are turning. It is good to be back in Chicago.
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