Water Falls
The whisper of your voice soaks me like rain
Covers me like honey
Enfolds me like a warm blanket.
I hear you in the wind and I am drenched in wonder
Filled with peace
Wanting the fire sky in my eyes
As I sit near you on the rocks smiling
You are naked in the waves smiling back at me.
“The water is warm dive in”, you say
I dip my toes and you splash me with your goodness
I dive in and you catch me around my waist and hold me tight.
I feel safe. I feel wet. I feel free.
Your laughter bathes me in sunlight
Under the waterfall we are dancing
We are making up songs to the sound of our own heart beats
I am splashing you and you are dunking me under the roaring water
I hold your body for comfort, for peace, for joy, for love.
I surrender to the water fall I feel inside…I am falling ….safely…
Monday, May 28, 2007
Writer's Angst
Writer Asks for Help!
Okay, Liz and Ed, what do you want? Please tell me want you want with each other. Ed speaks first.
“I don’t know what I want Eve. I am not sure of anything anymore. I would like to spend some time with Liz to get to know her again. But I don’t know beyond that. But if Katie shows up I don’t know what I’ll do.” Then Liz speaks.
“I want to have a chance to hang out with Ed. To go for a walk in the forest…to kiss would be nice. I don’t really know what I want either”.
Okay both of you sit down in a room together alone and let me ease drop.
“Okay I can do that,” says Ed.
“Me too”
“Hi Ed,” says Liz.
“Hi Liz,” Ed smiles back.
“How have you been Liz?”
“I have been okay,” Liz says trying to smile.
“Me too,” Ed says managing a grin.
You can sit down Liz. I am not going to bite you Liz, unless you ask me to. Liz has been standing in the corner of the room near the door.
“Please sit down Liz and talk with me.”
“Okay Ed. You go by Ed now right?” Liz moves closer.
“Yes my name is Ed, my friends and you can call me Ed.( a Blazing Saddler’s Reference).
Liz laughs and sits down across from Ed. Ed starts the conversation.
“I like it that you are here. Seeing you again makes me see things more clearly and at the same time more confused. I feel like I know you. But I really don’t know anything about you. Don’t get me wrong, I want to get to know you. In reality, I want to know you intimately. I hope that doesn’t scare you Liz, considering we haven’t seen each other in twenty years. I feel like a freak for obsession about you for twenty years. I wrote poetry to you.
“Okay, well Ed I must be a freakish girl along with you. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you for twenty years either. I know there have been other men.”
“In your case Liz, there have been many other men.” Liz buries her face in her hands and then gathers courage and looks up at Ed.
“Yes I admit I like sex. I always have. There is nothing wrong with that. Maybe I have jumped around from bed to bed looking for a guy who would fill me with the kind of loving feelings that you brought out in me. No guy no human guy could measure up to you in my mind.”
Liz feels good about getting that off her chest. She begins to breathe easier. Now it is Ed’s turn again.
“You know Liz I have a woman who adores me. Katie would do anything for me and is planning to visit me here in Michigan. I called your name out during sex. I was inside of her. Her smell of vanilla reminded me of you. Remember when we used to bake together with my mom. I couldn’t get out of my mind eating the cookie dough off your face.” Liz tries hard not to smile
“Oh shit Ed, you didn’t?” Ed continues.
“I had to convince Katie to visit me here because I was afraid to be alone with you, but that has all I have been thinking about doing since you emailed me. To be alone with you and kiss you, that is what I really want.” Liz hops off her chair and sits at Ed’s feet. Ed runs his hands through her hair. Liz tries to speak. Tears are beginning to run down her cheek.
“I want to stop running Ed. I want you to hold me and tell me it is safe to stop running. I have been running from you for twenty years and I am tired. I am so tired. Ed joins Liz on the floor and embraces her.
I think you two are ready to meet in the book. Lets see what happens.
Okay, Liz and Ed, what do you want? Please tell me want you want with each other. Ed speaks first.
“I don’t know what I want Eve. I am not sure of anything anymore. I would like to spend some time with Liz to get to know her again. But I don’t know beyond that. But if Katie shows up I don’t know what I’ll do.” Then Liz speaks.
“I want to have a chance to hang out with Ed. To go for a walk in the forest…to kiss would be nice. I don’t really know what I want either”.
Okay both of you sit down in a room together alone and let me ease drop.
“Okay I can do that,” says Ed.
“Me too”
“Hi Ed,” says Liz.
“Hi Liz,” Ed smiles back.
“How have you been Liz?”
“I have been okay,” Liz says trying to smile.
“Me too,” Ed says managing a grin.
You can sit down Liz. I am not going to bite you Liz, unless you ask me to. Liz has been standing in the corner of the room near the door.
“Please sit down Liz and talk with me.”
“Okay Ed. You go by Ed now right?” Liz moves closer.
“Yes my name is Ed, my friends and you can call me Ed.( a Blazing Saddler’s Reference).
Liz laughs and sits down across from Ed. Ed starts the conversation.
“I like it that you are here. Seeing you again makes me see things more clearly and at the same time more confused. I feel like I know you. But I really don’t know anything about you. Don’t get me wrong, I want to get to know you. In reality, I want to know you intimately. I hope that doesn’t scare you Liz, considering we haven’t seen each other in twenty years. I feel like a freak for obsession about you for twenty years. I wrote poetry to you.
“Okay, well Ed I must be a freakish girl along with you. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you for twenty years either. I know there have been other men.”
“In your case Liz, there have been many other men.” Liz buries her face in her hands and then gathers courage and looks up at Ed.
“Yes I admit I like sex. I always have. There is nothing wrong with that. Maybe I have jumped around from bed to bed looking for a guy who would fill me with the kind of loving feelings that you brought out in me. No guy no human guy could measure up to you in my mind.”
Liz feels good about getting that off her chest. She begins to breathe easier. Now it is Ed’s turn again.
“You know Liz I have a woman who adores me. Katie would do anything for me and is planning to visit me here in Michigan. I called your name out during sex. I was inside of her. Her smell of vanilla reminded me of you. Remember when we used to bake together with my mom. I couldn’t get out of my mind eating the cookie dough off your face.” Liz tries hard not to smile
“Oh shit Ed, you didn’t?” Ed continues.
“I had to convince Katie to visit me here because I was afraid to be alone with you, but that has all I have been thinking about doing since you emailed me. To be alone with you and kiss you, that is what I really want.” Liz hops off her chair and sits at Ed’s feet. Ed runs his hands through her hair. Liz tries to speak. Tears are beginning to run down her cheek.
“I want to stop running Ed. I want you to hold me and tell me it is safe to stop running. I have been running from you for twenty years and I am tired. I am so tired. Ed joins Liz on the floor and embraces her.
I think you two are ready to meet in the book. Lets see what happens.
Oh, Home at Last Intro
A three year old can come up with many adventures. When I was three, with the help of my favorite preschool teacher, Mrs. Arnold, I wrote my first story about a baby bird’s first solo flight. There was squawking from the baby bird, but once in flight she discovered she could fly and not hit the ground. Today, I feel some similar feelings about writing now at the lovely young age of 40. I wasn’t sure if I could write a novel, I felt a gentle push, then a harder kick in the pants by my characters. Edward Forester and Liz Levine told me they wanted to be in the world, outside of my head. (Even though my head is a cool place to hang.) I visualized these childhood sweethearts at a writer’s retreat ten years ago. Three years ago, I said to Ed and Liz and myself, “I am going to try to write your story.” I took weeks off from work and wrote everyday by the ocean. The writing just flowed out of me. (I have been a therapist for seventeen years and an oral historian for eight.) The character Liz is a therapist and world renowned for her knowledge of sex and relationships. I put a lot of my ideas about relationships into this book. It became an act of love to write and to finish a good draft. I am glad I’m going for it and leaping from the branch and learning to soar as a writer. You can check out some of my writing on www.rogerspark.com and http://brownstonetherapeutics.blogspot.com/. I look forward to meeting with you at the BEA. I hope you have a fun and productive experience.
Best,
Eve Brownstone
Best,
Eve Brownstone
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